“Deliberate speech is not just about choosing the right words; it is about conveying meaning, clarity, authenticity and purpose. Choosing Words That Lead Deliberate Communication for Effective Leadership By Ryan Anzalone, Account Representative, Ethos Group We often discuss the importance of being deliberate with our actions, checklists, goals and vision. However, we rarely pay such close attention to the words we use throughout the day, even though communication is one of the most important skills in our industry. There is great power in the words we use, how we use them and, occasionally, how we choose not to use them. To wield that power effectively, we need to be deliberate with our communication. What Is Deliberate Communication? Deliberate communication means making conscious choices about what we say and to whom we say it. Articulating your message effectively, whether in team building, employee appreciation, feedback, conflict resolution or executing a vision, can be the difference between implementation and frustration. Most people do not communicate particularly well under pressure or “under the influence,” though in this case I don’t mean the influence of substances. Rather, I refer to the influence of frustration, fatigue or fear. In those moments, it’s important to be impartial and remain flexible. Tone matters. Move with people, not against them. Statements such as “I understand that,” “I believe that,” or “Those are all good points,” help reduce defensiveness and create understanding. Focus on the person, not just their current attitude. What people say is less important than what they do. Excuses will always exist, but your job is to redirect the conversation back toward solutions and accountability. When people are frustrated or emotional, they naturally become more defensive. Clear communication and empathy will serve you well. Sometimes you have to forgo being right in order to be effective. The Power of Listening One of the biggest parts of communication, especially in difficult conversations, is listening. Listening is an essential part of another powerful communication tool: paraphrasing. Paraphrasing involves listening to someone else’s thoughts, feelings or ideas, then restating them in your own words while retaining the original meaning. You might start with something like: • “Let me be sure I heard you correctly...” • “Just so I understand...” • “Here’s what I hear you saying...” 9 ILLINOIS AUTOMOBILE DEALER NEWS
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